All posts by Film Pigs

Movie Commentaries

Commentary #37 – The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)

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Some kids grow up wanting to be a policeman, a fireman, or an astronaut. Not Dieter Laser. He looked at the state of mad scientism in the world and said “NEIN!” Frankenstein’s monster was great and all, but the creature was missing two critical elements: somebody attached to his butt and face. Herr Laser corrects this rookie mistake in an awesomely over-the-top performance that is nothing less than creepily delightful.  (IMDb)

TO SYNC WITH MOVIE: Start this commentary 10 seconds after starting movie.

Film Pigs Podcast

Podcast #2 – Shaky Cam

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We’re back with a brand-new Podcast, discussing all things movies and movie news! This week’s subject of ire is the shaky cam and how it’s become an annoying crutch used by filmmakers to convey frantic tension without having to actually craft a scene.

Also, as a bonus service to our listeners, at 7 points during the recording this podcast contains a meta commentary on how technology is advancing at such a rapid pace it is often difficult to tell when such technologies will conflict with each other. It is NOT a stupid mistake of putting an iPhone too close to powered speakers.

This time, on a very special episode of The Film Pigs Podcast:

Continue reading Podcast #2 – Shaky Cam →
Film Pigs Podcast

Podcast #1 – Teen Comedies

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Welcome one and all to the premiere Film Pigs Podcast! This new feature will focus on what the Pigs do best: extended complaining about the movies and the people who make them. Each episode will be based on a theme chosen by that week’s host and will contain rants, features, bits, thoughtful discussion, and the finest audio effects that can be crammed into a MacBook.

Continue reading Podcast #1 – Teen Comedies →
Movie Commentaries

Commentary #36 – Retardead (2008)

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The second in our Holiday Season 2010 double-feature, Retardead is a more-or-less sequel to Monsturd. The mad scientist who created the poo creature from the first movie is back, this time injecting mentally challenged people with a serum that eventually turns them into zombies. Again, as far as gross/offensive premises are concerned, this is right on the money.

Unfortunately, the same issues from Monsturd remain: the ultra-low budget home movie style is made unwatchable by the entire production winking at the audience and itself in every scene. Retardead is also longer than Monsturd, which doesn’t help. The Film Pigs were pretty cranky by this point and in a much less forgiving mood. Which is the exact opposite of how you’re supposed to behave during the holidays. Maybe we ate too much Monkey Bread.

NETFLIX ALERT!

This commentary was recorded while watching Retardead on Netflix. All instructions for syncing to the movie are in the commentary, so give a listen and follow the crystal clear steps for maximum holiday cheer.